Episode 1: George Floyd, Denise Richards, and Cheating Spouses

[00:00:00] Chris: Mom, it’s not even noon.

Hello, my friends, welcome to wine therapy. Oh, that was my terrible attempt at trying to do a like low, basic, sexy voice. I've always wanted to have one of those low Barry white voices, but instead of, I just sound like my mom.

Nancy:  just start chain smoking,

Chris: actually, that's a good, that's a good idea. welcome to our podcast. That's called wine therapy. My name's Chris Evans, and many of you know me [00:01:00] from social media, mostly, probably from Twitter. We are doing this with my very good friend of many years, Nancy. Who we traveled together. We drank together. We get into all kinds of depravity and debauchery. And so I fought, you know, I was going to do a podcast.

I couldn't do it without her, as my cohost. So say hello, Nancy.

Nancy: Hello, everyone. I'm the boozy aunt that travels too much.

Chris: Yes. And many other things. Yes. So I kind of wanted to do something that was sort of emblematic of what people find on my timeline. People follow me for a lot of different reasons. So there's, you know, the political stuff, the social justice stuff, [00:02:00] some people sort of following you because of my live tweeting and the game of Thrones.

Some people following him just because I post funny memes, you know? So I figured let's have the podcast kind of reflect all of those things.

When she, and I get together, we open up a bottle of wine or two or three,

Nancy: it's our four

Chris: and just kind of talk shit and, and watch the same movies for like the 100th time and just have a lot of fun. And so I felt like let's do something where it's kinda got that vibe to it. And so. There's so many, very serious, terrible things going on now, politically, socially, financially that I thought people would want something that's just kind of fun to listen to, whereas you're on your way home from work or you get home [00:03:00] and you just want to kind of unwind and, and just have a good time.

So we're going to try to make this as well, rounded as possible and cover all kinds of topics. So. One of the cool things that we're going to do is we have a website that's going to have all the episodes on it, including transcripts, for those of you who want that. And I know I listened to podcasts. There are times when it's like an hour long podcast and I'm annoyed that I have to listen to the entire thing when I really only wanted to hear it.

The 10 minutes that they're discussing a particular topic. So what we're going to do, that's going to make it easy for people who don't want to listen to everything is I'll post time code guides on our website for each episode. So that if you want to just hear us talk about. You know, a Supreme court decision that came out, we'll give you the time code for that, so that you don't have to sit through [00:04:00] our discussions about real Housewives of Beverly Hills.

So it just makes it easy for everyone to, who wants to just kind of listen to what they want to listen to.

And I'll give you all that information at the end of the show. Where you can find the episodes. And please, if you can go and you know, to Apple podcasts, to Google podcasts, wherever you listen and download the episodes that we are going to have available. So that, you know, we can help, you can help us get into the new and noteworthy feature in iTunes.

So, and leave a review button, please subscribe. So the first thing we're going to talk about is obviously there is a lot of unrest right now in every part of the country, [00:05:00] especially. Here in the U S but even in other countries, you know, we we've seen it in the UK and Italy and other places, Canada, of course, about this police brutality, the issue that's kind of in the zeitgeists guys right now been a couple of examples have happened that are getting the most attention, but obviously there are so many nameless, faceless people who this happens to every day that we don't necessarily hear about.

But I think we can start with George Floyd. And for those of you who don't know, my understanding is that the police were dispatched. This was in Minnesota, in Minneapolis for what was a counterfeit 20. And. A man ended up dead, a black man named George Floyd over the most petty of [00:06:00] alleged crimes. We have video of not only one officer with his knee on George's neck, as he's saying, I can't breathe and calling out for his mother for eight minutes and some odd seconds.

Nancy: 46.

Chris: Yeah. And. Then there was another video that I saw that showed the minutes just before that, you know, because people always say, Oh, well, what happened before this? What's the context? What did he do to, to prompt that response from the officer? And of course we've seen a video of the minutes just before that, where George has already restrained and in the back of the police car.

And it appeared from the angle of the video that the officer was beating him in the back of the car. And, you know, let's not forget of course, that there were other officers that were there at the scene seen on the video who [00:07:00] were not directly involved in causing his death, but we're standing there as bystanders and not intervening or doing anything about it.

One of so many of these types of police brutality cases that we've been seeing for so many years in this country, particularly toward black Americans, particularly toward black men. And this one I think is getting the most attention because it was caught on video.

It was so clearly, so clearly egregious from what we saw it's people are just are fed up.

Nancy: Yeah. I, I started the video for the first time that I tried to watch it and I had to stop it because it's, he's literally pleading where [00:08:00] he please, everything hurts. And then I had to hit pause and look away. It's a very upsetting video.

And the second that he started calling for his mother, that's when I lost it, I did see a really adorable clip of his daughter. someone had posted on Instagram. Of her on someone's shoulders. And she's seeing like all the protesters and people that are out there and she's like, daddy changed world. And I was like, well, that's actually a really touching clip, amidst all the chaos that we're seeing of riots and tear gas and, you know, rubber bullets, which I did not even realize.

I'm not smart. So I thought rubber bullet like, Oh, how much damage could it do? Oh my God. Some of the pictures that are getting posted from these protests of people getting hit with rubber bullets at like point blank range and it leaving like these massive welts and cuts and Ugh, it's terrible.

Chris: And they're using tear [00:09:00] gas and these rubber bullets on, in from many accounts, what appear to be peaceful protesters.

No. It's one thing to utilize those tools when you've got violent riot or something that you're trying to, to break up for the purpose of public safety. But in many cases, there were these peaceful protests who, which actually turned into violent protests after the police arrived and, and, and showed up with agitating the situation, escalating it.

But. So now there's been all these discussions about whether the police should be able to use these things like the rubber bullets, like the tear gas. I believe I just read the other day about people who have been dying from after getting hit with the tear gas. And not only that, but apparently tear gas is.

[00:10:00] Can cause they can terminate a pregnancy, which I wasn't aware of till just recently.

Nancy: And so, yeah.

Chris: And so for the pro life crowd who supposedly cares about unborn children, you would think that they would be the biggest advocates of the police not using a chemical weapon that could cause a woman to lose her pregnancy, but I haven't seen them say anything about that.

Nancy: Well, look on the bright side. At least there's not a national or global pandemic going on that affects the lungs, right? At least we don't have that also happening, right. For shootings here,

Chris: Christ. So much of this is, you know, a culmination of anger surrounding so many of these events that have happened recently with Brianna Taylor, who was.

In her house, sleeping with her [00:11:00] boyfriend, literally sleeping. And there was a no knock warrant that the police had, not for her house for someone else's they went to the wrong house and they claimed they identified themselves when they came in Brianna's boyfriend's hesitated not. And when they came in, they shot Briana she's dead.

And her boyfriend thinking that they was an intruder. Pulled out his gun, which per the second amendment he is allowed to have and defended himself and ended up shooting one of the officers who is, There were no fatalities on the law enforcement side, but I believe that were injured. And so they actually, in addition to murdering this woman who had done nothing wrong, They then locked up the boyfriend for attempted murder for having shot the officer.

Now, what is interesting to me is, you know, the police say that they [00:12:00] identified themselves when they came in, but there is audio of Brianna's boyfriend. Calling nine one one. And it's, if you, it's very hard to listen to, if you want to listen to it, it's out there. It's a very hard to listen to because he is, he it's heartbreaking.

He's, he's literally sitting there watching his girlfriend die and you can kind of tell that he knows that she's already dead and she's talking to the nine 11 operator and. You can tell in the call that he doesn't know what just happened. He tells her that these people just came into my house and I don't know what happened.

They just came in shooting and it's clear that he didn't know that they were law enforcement. I believe now, after public outrage, they have dropped the charges against him and he's, he's been released.

Nancy: Didn't they get rid of the no knock warrants. Now, after that,

Chris: I don't know if they did, actually,

Nancy: I know there was a petition going [00:13:00] around.

but. I think it actually got an acted. I would have to look it up, but I think the last thing I read about it was that it went through and passed on her actual birthday.

Chris: Yeah. Well, if that's true, that's great. you know, this no nonsense,

Nancy: I think, no, I don't care if they identified themselves or not.

How disorienting must have be you're dead asleep in bed. And even if they yelled that doesn't guarantee, I don't know what the layout of the house was that they would even hear them identifying themselves for however loud. And also who's to say, it's not just a random, crazy person that's breaking and saying, they're the cops.

Like I, I get why that guy reacted, how he did. I just, yeah, I can't.

Chris: I asked the arguments knocked warrants is that. you know, in the case of like Roger Stone, for instance, I believe when they arrested him. they had a no knock warrant. And the reason that they typically have them is because they don't want give the suspect a heads up to be able to either one [00:14:00] flea, number two, destroy evidence or number three.

Sit there and have an arsenal of weapons ready to fire on the police as soon as they come in. So the idea is you're giving the law enforcement yeah. A, an element of surprise too. You preserve the evidence to make sure they don't get away and to, and so that the police are not walking into, you know, a firefighter be trapped or something, you know, yeah, but there's gotta be a better way to do the, because you can't, you can't, you can't have it both ways where you say, you know, in the case of like George Zimmerman, for instance, where you say, Oh, well, you know, we have the right to stand our ground when we feel threatened.

You know, when, when my personal safety is threatened or when my property's being threatened, but then at the same time, say that. A homeowner is in the wrong when someone enters their home, that they don't know, and they have to defend themselves because they don't know what's going on. It's it's you can't have it both [00:15:00] ways.

Nancy: You see that Dave Chappelle released, 27 minutes of standup where he like fully addressed, George Floyd and the black lives matter and all the protesting, it was actually extremely like touching and eloquent. It wasn't really, you know, it wasn't quote unquote standup, but, I think he really highlighted it in a very.

Very thoughtful way. And my favorite part about it was he talked about all the young people that are out there moving forward with this movement and getting all the attention and how he trusts the young people. And he's good to ride in the back of this car, that these are the people that are gonna incite change and get the attention on all these issues and make the world better.

Chris: Did he talk about Brianna Taylor

Nancy: briefly? He mentioned her name.

Chris: Yeah. Yeah. I mean, I I've been a little frustrated because I feel like this is a topic for a [00:16:00] whole nother episode, but I feel like when you know, and what this does, statistics tell us that, you know, black men are most often the ones who have interactions with the police.

And that are most often the victims of violence and cetera forced by those interactions with the police. But I feel like when this stuff happens to black women, it doesn't get as much attention. Yeah. Taylor, hasn't gotten as much attention as, as George Floyd has and I've seen it a lot of people, particularly black women on.

Social media, keep putting her name out there and reminding people, you know, let's not forget about her, but I just, I thought it was interesting to see that it, it took the George Floyd thing for people to do all of these

Nancy: proteins. And I just thought to

Chris: myself why. Yeah. Right. Yeah, exactly. [00:17:00] But so they're there.

I mean, but there's been so many things that have been happening the past couple of weeks and. You had said something before we move on from George Floyd, you wanted to say something about the woman who was recording.

Nancy: Oh yes. So first of all, let me pull her name back up. So number one, I didn't realize she was 17 years old.

Wow. Darnella Frazier. so she's the one that actually took the video. And there was an article that got posted about how she's literally having to seek like mental help, because she's getting terrorized online about like, why didn't you do anything? You just stood there and filmed, why didn't you get involved?

Like, you're just as much at fault. Like apparently she's been getting it from every angle and I can't imagine. The I was terrorized just watching the video. I can't imagine that happening five feet from me.

Chris: Yeah. I mean, I don't know [00:18:00] what people would expect her to have done. You have no, it's not as if you saw two random citizens going at it.

Like you, you see. A law enforcement interaction where you have not one, but I believe it was three officers or maybe it was four. I forgot.

Nancy: Yeah. Four, I think.

Chris: And, and so what are you supposed to do, you know, especially, you know, as a private citizen who has no authority over the police or do you, what exactly are you supposed to do in that situation other than

Nancy: a minor at that?

Chris: Yeah. And she, and she's 17 years old, you know, what is she supposed to do? I think one of the, I think it's very easy for people to say, you know, and this irritates me a lot. When I see people posting incidents of racism that they've experienced videos and people say, Oh, well, you know, if it was me, I would have done X, Y, and Z.

And it's like, well, a lot of times when you experience certain things, you're so shocked by what's happening, [00:19:00] that it doesn't kick in immediately. The correct response or how you should respond. You know, you don't know what to do in that particular moment. And maybe 10 minutes later, an hour later, or a day later, you think, Oh man, why didn't I do this?

Why didn't I do that? But it's shocking when these sorts of things happen. And again, there are police officers, they have guns, they have Bhutan's, they have tasers, they have everything else. I don't know what people expect her to do.

Nancy: Plus there's that whole fight or flight response, right? Like it adrenaline completely takes over.

It's not like you're going to sit there and go, Oh, well, let's have rational thoughts right now about how this all makes me feel. You just

Chris: react, right? Yeah. It's a, it's very visceral at that point. And, so the, but there's been a couple of other things that have happened. We had the Amod Arbery situation in, I believe it was Georgia.

Where [00:20:00] there were two white men, father and son. Apparently there was a burglary in a house that was under construction nearby and they saw a video of someone saw a video of a mod Arbery who was a young man jogging. As he typically does in this, on this route that he was jogging on and they identified him as the guy in the video that allegedly committed a burglary and decided to deputize themselves, get in their funky ass pickup truck with their guns and drive down the road, chasing him.

In order to, I don't know what they were planning to do. Apprehend him would tie him up and drive to the police station. I don't know, but when they got there, they confronted him or the son [00:21:00] did anyway, and he didn't know who they were or what they wanted with him. And he was defending himself. But you have a guy who you have a, two white guys driving up to you with a truck and holding guns.

And one of them gets out and comes towards you holding that gun. Your response is going to be to fight back because you don't know what's gonna, it happened. And so that's what happened. And so they, they were, you know, sort of fighting with each other for a second and kind of doing a tug of war sort of thing with the gun as the video shows and ultimately the son's punk ass pulls the gun away and shoots him several times, I believe, you know, because he was losing the fist fight.

Of course. So we just figured, let me just grab my gun and shoot him. And so they shot him and he's dead. And someone has lost their son, their brother, their cousin, their uncle, their whatever. He was to [00:22:00] his loved ones. All because these guys decided they were going to take a law into their own hands. Which, by the way, that's what a lynching is.

This literally was a modern day lynching. This is what they would do when, when they would Lynch people in, in Jim Crow, they would, you know, they would get themselves whipped up in a frenzy because some white woman said, you know, this, you know, some black guy raped me or whistled at me or whatever. And then they would go driving around, rounding up black men, questioning them, terrorizing them, and they would torture them and hang them or worse.

And that's basically what it was. And then what makes it even worse is that after the fact we learn that the, I believe the prosecutor in that County. Has a personal relationship with the father, the white [00:23:00] father and God, and that the dad used to work in the police department as some sort of investigator at one point.

And so it was when this story broke in the news, it actually happened, I believe a month prior. And the paperwork showed that this prosecutor determined that this was self defense. And so when you see the video you go, huh? Whose self-defense is this? How can you pursue someone in your truck with a gun?

And then when they defend themselves, say, Oh, it was self-defense because he was fighting with my son. Well, yeah, because you jumped out of the fucking truck with your gun and came after him. What did, what, what would you expect he would do? Just say yes. Massah I'll come along. No bitch. You're he's going to [00:24:00] throw hands and that's exactly what happened.

So I believe they ended up because of the conflict of interest. They gave the case to a different prosecutor. And now that the father and son have been arrested. but you know, let's see if they end up getting convicted, you know, because it seems so often in these cases that these people get away with it.

But it's just that, that video, it's a short video and I believe the person who took the video was also arrested as well later. As a co you know, as a accomplice, but, why, just why? And they're, they're they, they released a video that they were referring to of the so-called burglary and all the video shows is cause you know how they have you, you're driving down the road and you see there's a house that's being built or some kind of, not even necessarily a house, but something is clearly under construction.

And people get out all the time and just kind of peek in and say, [00:25:00] Oh, what's going on in here? And what are they building? And you know, what's happening here. And that's exactly what he did. He, he, you could see, you see a mod on the video walking in kind of looking around and taking stock of what the construction site was and then leaving.

He doesn't take anything with him. And in fact, that same camera that was recording recorded. So many other people, white people who did the exact same thing, where they came in and were being nosy and was like, Oh, what's this and left. So what I want to know is why, why do white people, particularly white men feel that they have the power to deputize themselves and go around playing vigilante?

Watching

Nancy: too much Batman growing up.

Chris: I, I don't, I don't understand. It's like, it has nothing to do with you. It wasn't even their house. So this is, see, this is, this is the problem is [00:26:00] that they're clearly racist. And so they're looking for some excuse to find to terrorize black people. And they found it in this video of the quote unquote burglary.

I don't know if they're thinking that they're in call of duty or what the situation, I mean, I'm serious. It's like these people who were so obsessed with their fucking guns and their, their, you know, military gear and all of this stuff, it's like, this is real life people. This is not a game. And I'm just, I'm hoping that there are actual consequences for these people that were involved, because if they are not sent to prison for this murder and that's exactly what it was, let's be clear.

It was a murder. Then what message are you sending to the black people of America, the black people of your state, the black people of your city? [00:27:00] When two white men, technically three can hunt down a black person, who's done nothing to them and shoot them and kill them dead in the street. And that there are no consequences.

That's what I want to know. And to all the people out there who keep acting like racism is a thing of the past. Look at what's happening. How is what happened to a mod Arbery any different than the type of shit that happened during Jim Crow, how he was guilty of jogging wild, black, essentially, and was murdered for no good reason.

Nancy: Do you feel more hopeful with, I guess the state of things after seeing how, how big the reaction to George Floyd has been from a global scale? Like, do you feel more hopeful that good things are coming or are you like still feeling like it's the [00:28:00] same old shit? How many people have to die and nothing ever changes?

Chris: Well, we actually have some objective data on that. I've seen some polling that showed that now the majority of Americans support black lives matter and support. NFL players kneeling during the national Anthem. I mean, that's a huge shift in public opinion, compared to a

Nancy: year ago, lost their shit.

Chris: There is some objective data that says that the tide is turning at least in terms of how people are telling folks that they feel.

And it appears that because this whole issue of, of racial injustice with policing is in as EIT Geist. That we're finally seeing some actual policy changes happening. You know, we're seeing places around the country ban the choke hold. We're seeing all of these different policies put in place, place to be checked on the [00:29:00] police and their excessive force and all of that stuff.

But my concern is, well, I have a couple of concerns. One is, is that it's a passing fad. That all of these people putting, you know, black lives matter in their bio and the hashtags and the, this, and the, that, and the black square on their photo. That it's something that's fun and cool in the moment. And a couple of months from now, they'll go back to their ice lattes and their yoga and forget about it because it was a moment in time.

Because this is not something that's going to be fixed tomorrow. It's a systemic problem in every aspect of law enforcement and the criminal justice system. The other thing is, and I, and I made a whole thread about this, which I'll post on this episode's page as well, but I said [00:30:00] accessible force and the lethal nature of policing.

Is a very important issue because it can, it results in actual lives being lost. But the underlying issue is not just the way the police are conducting themselves, but the racist attitudes that are influencing the behavior to begin with. And so the police are hap are able to be much more dangerous physically because they have they're armed and they have badges that allow them to use those arms legally.

But let's be clear. Racism affects every aspect of people's lives in a systemic way. So let's say that police officer that put his knee on George Floyd's neck instead is a bank loan officer. And he doesn't like black people and maybe he acknowledges that and is a hateful [00:31:00] person. Or maybe his racial bias is subconscious.

Maybe it's, he's not aware that he has this implicit bias toward black people. And so he has two different people come in for, to apply for a loan for a small business or for a mortgage. They have the same credentials, same credit score. Well, guess what his racism is going to affect, whether that black person is going to get that loan.

When you have a doctor, let's say he was a doctor. Instead that race has him, it's going to affect the treatment. He gives to black people coming in saying that they have medical problems or that they're in pain. We know this from the data that the white doctors and nurses, when they see black patients, they think black people are lying about the pain that they're in and they don't treat their ailments properly.

Do you see this with even people who aren't famous and have a lot of money like Serena [00:32:00] Williams, who said she almost died because her doctors were not listening to her. And so the, we have this whole issue of the black maternal mortality. It goes into red lining where people are allowed to live. Cory Booker has a famous story about his parents, where they tried to buy a house in a certain neighborhood.

They weren't allowed. And so they had a white family come back and pose as them, and they were allowed to move in. That type of thing happens all the time, even still today. And so, and, you know, and it goes on and on and on, in, into education, into everything. So I just want people to think about. This whole black lives matter.

And this whole issue of systemic racism, it's not just limited to the criminal justice system. It's, it's a pervasive issue in every aspect of life.

So I'm hoping that [00:33:00] these, these protests really raise people's awareness and hopefully we can keep up this momentum of. Really paying attention to this issue. But the, the thing that I have to say I love that's happening is how many racists are exposing themselves and losing their jobs. So let's

Nancy: so easy.

Keep a clean friendless now, because the second I see the. But all lives matter a shit. You're one of the dumb ones. All right, let me go. This mother fucker off that timeline.

Chris: Hold on, hold on, hold on. Let, let's pour another glass of wine on this before we get into this mess.

Nancy: Oh yes. So I was saving my poor

Chris: just for you.

So for those who can't see, which is all of you, actually, we have these wine glasses that are designed to be able to hold the entire bottle of wine. So you can actually pour the whole [00:34:00] bottle in and just, I mean, it's very misleading the way that it's shaped you can't really tell if you were looking at that it's an entire bottle of wine, but in fact it is.

Nancy: I'm about to pour my entire bottle of wine into this class,

huh?

No, but I will say, I do think. It's cause you ever have like a major public event or something happened or like an election. And then you see your friend posts, whatever their bad opinion is or whatever their opinion is. And you're like, Oh man, now this is a whole thing I got to deal with. So after watching all the stuff populate, just gross stuff, populate on my feed.

I'm like, yeah, [00:35:00] let's just get, get rid of these. I don't, I don't want these. People around. I will say though, with the whole black square thing on Instagram, and I didn't even, I didn't even think about this, but I saw multiple accounts posts where they were begging people to delete the black squares with the black lives matter, hashtag because it was burying all of this protest information and contact information because when people would search the hashtag where they would normally get their information, it was just flooded with black squares.

Chris: Wow.

Nancy: Yeah. And have you seen any of the audio or video clips of police officers talking to each other with handling the protesters? Cause those are pretty gross too.

Chris: Yeah.

Nancy: About like people on the street, like just run them over and then like hyping them all up. Like, and you gotta hit him. Hit him hard, not too hard.

Like who are you? Are these people?

Chris: Well, Do you have a lot of sociopaths signing up to be police officers, and let's not forget by the way [00:36:00] that domestic violence is incredibly high among police officer families. So think about that. You literally have wife beaters out in the street serving and protecting that one thing I did read that was interesting was that.

There is some data that shows that there are much less, complaints of excessive force against female officers. And the whole article was basically arguing that if you want to solve the issue of police brutality, hire more women because they're more likely to not lose their cool deescalate when they come to a scene to not.

Just try to buss someone's head because they I'm hurt their feelings are hurt, their ego or whatever. They're just much better able to. Handle situations without going psycho basically.

Nancy: But what are you talking about? Women are so [00:37:00] emotional with their tiny lady brains. There's no way they could do that.

Right.

Chris: I don't know how many of you have been watching this season of real Housewives of Beverly Hills, but it's. It's been pretty good. They've got some new cast members. They have this Southern bell Sutton who personally, I find very annoying. So I don't know where her money comes from, but apparently she's very rich and she FaceTimes herself, you know, this big fashionista, you know, she thinks she's Anna Wintour and.

Has all these very pointed opinions about everyone's fashion. She doesn't seem to be getting along with anybody this [00:38:00] season, quite frankly, including the person who brought her onto the show, which I think was Lisa Rinna.

Nancy: Yeah. Renna brought her.

Chris: And so there's her, but there's also for the first time on the show, they have a black.

Cast member actress. Garcelle Beauvais who I really liked, like on the shower. I just wish he had more scenes, but unlike the rest of the women, she actually has a real job. So she tends to be busy working when they're doing all of their little girls trips and other things. But the real mess this season is surrounding Denise Richards, who I really liked her in the last season of the show.

Nancy: Me too.

Chris: She was like low key laid back and she seemed normal. She was kind of self deprecating, the

Nancy: jeans and a tee shirt. She wasn't like concerned with being extra. She kind of just watched the shenanigans and be like, wow, what a [00:39:00] group? Like I liked her calming energy that she had

Chris: every housewife show.

It's almost like the spice girls. Like you need different personalities that are gonna fit to make the group work. And you always need that one person who's not in the middle of the drama, but just kind of sitting back, being an objective observer from it all.

Nancy: And so she just

Chris: exactly. Yeah, so she was kind of fulfilling that role, but this season it's a whole another mess child.

She, so she has this husband, Aaron, who. I thought it was a cool guy in the first season, he seemed very supportive of Denise and kind of like down to earth and

Nancy: super thoughtful.

Chris: She told us all about how he has a big penis and everything else. And then this season something's up something in the milk and cleaning because she, she from the area, the beginning.

So from the very first episode, Charlie's sheen. [00:40:00] Denise's ax. Who's the father of her children apparently went to court to file, to not have to pay child support anymore. Even though according to Denise, she never pursued the child support. Like he, he owes the child support, but she never like took him to court or like reported it or anything.

I think she just was like, he's not going to pay. And don't just I'll deal with it. Well, for whatever reason, and regardless, he decided to go back to court and actually try to get an order to stop the child support. And all the girls are talking about, Oh, Denise, you know, you need to get a lawyer, you need to do this.

You need to do that. And the niece is acting like it's just no big deal. And how she just going to ignore it and not do anything about it. And they're like, Oh, okay. But girl, like what are you going to do with like the court tape comments? Like, you're just going to not show up. Like you're not what, and they kept pushing it because it wasn't making [00:41:00] sense.

And she's just like, Oh, I appreciate it. They're trying to help. But you know, why can't they just leave me alone and mind their business and blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. So I, that, so from the very beginning, that was just a little bit odd. Then we go into the next Denise drama, which is. They had a barbecue. I believe it was at Kyle's house.

They start having a conversation about threesomes. I don't even know how that came up, but they were talking about threesomes and Erica

Nancy: just remember Erika Jayne sang very specifically. She'd never been with another woman. Only a couple. I don't remember the catalyst for that comment, but yeah,

Chris: they were going around and talking about their experiences, having threesomes and.

I think Garcelle said that she kissed another girl in college or something, but that was it. And Erica said, yeah, I've had relations with a couple, but not like a one, you know, one woman by herself. And this was a party that children were at as well, but they were, you know, at the kids' table, but I guess they [00:42:00] were in earshot of this adult conversation.

And you know, the kids apparently I guess could kind of overhear it. They're talking about. I started sort of giggling and Denise. Yes. Wild things. Starship troopers, Denise Richard was just clutching her pearls child. And so just incense that they could be talking about sex and threesomes when there are children in the room and, Oh my gosh, how could this happen?

You know, you guys need to be quiet because my kids are here and, you know, she leaves the party and she's so upset about this conversation. Hasn't taken place and. She brings it up multiple times, times she brings it up to Erica and tries to make Erica feel bad about talking about the threesomes. And then she brings it up again to Sutton and I believe Teddy on a separate occasion and she keeps bringing it up again.

When they're in the group situations about this whole threesome conversation. And so you're wondering why is she like a [00:43:00] dog with a bone with this whole threesome thing? It doesn't make sense. But then of course we find out that apparently, and we're not, they haven't shown this yet on the show, but they've alluded to it that Brandi Glanville, who was once a cast member of this show, that Denise was having an affair with her.

And so. I don't know, we haven't, these haven't aired yet, so I don't know all the details. So I don't know if it's Denise was sleeping with Brandy separately from her husband and her husband didn't know about it, or if they were all sleeping with each other together in a threesome situation, or if it was like they have an open marriage, I don't know, but it starts to make sense why she was so touchy about the threesome conversation and her kids here.

Again. Because of her, I guess her anxiety about people finding out about this whole branding thing.

Nancy: But I mean, aren't those [00:44:00] kids that were sitting there.

Chris: They're all like high school age. I think there, we're seeing younger kids there as well. Cause I think, I think, Denise's younger child was there as well, but either way she keeps talking about how her older daughter, I think her name is Sammy.

You know, came to her and she was so upset and just so embarrassed about what happened. You know, her friends were there and they were all mortified and blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. Meanwhile, you know, cause Bravo loves to do those shady flashbacks. They showed what happened

Nancy: for part,

Chris: okay. Her daughter she's she brings it out with her daughter.

The daughter didn't bring it up to her. So Denise brings it up and the daughter was like, no, we didn't care. We thought it was funny. And that was it. And which is by the way, exactly what Lisa Rinna said. She's like this that's weird. Cause I know Sammy and I feel like she would just laugh it off and not even care.

Denise is the one claiming that. Her children were like emotionally [00:45:00] scarred by overhearing this 10 minute conversation about threesomes. It's like, girl, no, one's buying this stop.

Nancy: Well, and let's not forget too, that all these kids now have smartphones. So like, I feel like they find out about topics like that a little earlier than maybe we did

Chris: exactly.

That's what I, my feeling is. This is not, you know, 1973, if you're, if your child is too young to know what threesomes are, then you have nothing to worry about. If your child is old enough to know what threesomes are, then what was the harm. But by the way, don't you think they have Google? Don't you think they have the internet PornHub?

Like how, how delusional. Could you possibly be to think that your teenager doesn't know about sex and doesn't know what a threesome is. And there was also another point [00:46:00] in the show when they were talking about talking to their kids about where babies came from and Denise, and one of the other moms was like, Oh yeah, we told her, you know, that it's a miracle, it's a miracle that the baby ends up in the woman's stomach and it's historic.

And the, this and the, that, and Erica Jane is like, Really like you can't just say the penis goes in the vagina, but. What is, I, I've never understood this whole thing of, if we don't talk to our kids about sex, that they won't it'll keep them from having it. You know, I grew up in a household where my mother was very blunt with me and my brother about sex from an extremely early age, so that I was like five, six, and I knew all the, all there was to know that you know, that there was appropriate for a kid to know about sex.

And at the time, because I wasn't yet exposed to, you know, the playground and what people are saying and what was in the porn magazines and everything else. [00:47:00] I just was like, Oh, okay, cool. Like, it wasn't, it wasn't controversial. It wasn't didn't scar me. It didn't like make me uncomfortable. It was just very matter of fact, like, okay, that's what it is.

That's why people do it. And so I just have never understood this school of thought that. If we keep it from them, if we keep the information from them, then that'll keep them from having sex. It doesn't make any sense.

Nancy: Yeah. Those are the ones that end up pregnant at 16,

Chris: exactly. With the STDs, because they're not having Jacqueline sex,

Nancy: they're not on the pill.

Chris: God knows, or God knows what else. But the other thing that has been so. Bizarre about Denise is seeing how unhinged her husband is this season. It's really scary. So there's this scene where they're all at a dinner party and I believe they were doing a game of first impression. [00:48:00] First impression it's like go around the table and say what your first impression was of the person that was sitting next to you.

And it was such that it's so

Nancy: goddamn messy. I love it. That's so messy to do, but I'm a thousand

Chris: percent here until they got to Sutton because she was the only person that actually played the game. Honestly.

Nancy: Yeah. I was disappointed in the other Housewives, like, come on, you know, why we're

Chris: here? Point of the game is to say, okay, this is what my first impression was of the person.

And here's what I think of them now. And they're supposed to obviously be a contrast. But everyone was like, well, when I first met Garcelle I thought that she was really beautiful and funny. And now that I've gotten to know her, I know she really is beautiful and fun. It's like, no, bitch, that's not the game.

You're supposed to say something shady.

Nancy: I always thought that you had

Chris: such a great, I have good impressions of people when we first meet them. Not necessarily most of the time and yeah. And so that was, [00:49:00] that was supposed to be, you know, supposed to be a bonding exercise of like, well, you know, you kind of seemed a little standoffish at first, but now I know that, you know, you're a really nice person and blah, blah, blah, blah.

Anyway, so that was the game. And then at some point they started discussing Denise's husband, Aaron, and what he does for a living. Now I believe it was Kyle that asked and she asked it by the way in a very, just casual, cool conversation tone, just like a normal, you know, normal thing that you would say, if you're at a dinner party and you don't know what someone does and you say, you know, Oh, what are you?

You know, what do you do? Can you explain it? And, this is what happened. Everything you've been taught about how disease process and stuff works is not true.

I have [00:50:00] to be careful. Say what? Explain 12. I was living next to the largest nuclear facility in North America. I watched everybody die of cancer. I couldn't understand why we can split an atom with sound and cause a nuclear explosion.

You at Adam, there's lots of space, right? Electron, proton, neutron, whatever. So there's a lot of space. Space is empty space, right? 99.9% is space, but it's oscillating at a frequency that appears to be real. And our reality. Does it make sense to one, know why cancer comes in?

Nancy: Why? Yes,

Chris: because it's protecting you of infection.

Your immune system did not respond to it and you would have died in 12 hours. It's your best friend that protect you from somebody. Who's going to shoot you in the head with a brick. That's what cancer is. Approve it all day long. That's [00:51:00] fascinating. Dr. Aaron,

Nancy: Oh, wait. You're not a doctor.

Chris: You don't even play one on

Nancy: TV.

Chris: We can split an atom with sound cause a nuclear explosion killed people. You can't figure what is cancer about the common cold?

What fuck

Nancy: the second I heard the, well there's already people following us. So I was like, this just got like, I don't have my tinfoil hat ready to, like, I didn't know that this is what we were doing today.

Chris: I, I mean, I've watched that scene a couple of times now, and I don't know what to say other than I'm sure.

Like I don't,

first of all, the fact that he's sitting there talking about, he starts the conversation by [00:52:00] saying everything you know, about the way disease. Process works. It's not true, but okay. All right. but then he goes on to start talking about the space and Sonic booms and all this other shit

Nancy: split. Now,

Chris: what are you talking about?

What are you talking about? So I guess what he does is, you know, I don't know how many of you have been to California LA in particular. They are such like health junkies out there. And they are, there are so many different like scam health fads that you'll find, you know, the, every week there's a new treatment that pops up that's that people are all excited about and everyone starts doing it.

The crypto, whatever thing, where you get in and it's it, you're frozen for a [00:53:00] second, as opposed. It's supposedly like. Brings it to your fat cells or some shit like that, but like all kinds of, there's all kinds of stuff like that out there. You know, this Marianne Williamson put crystals on your pussy and like others, shit like that.

That just, it doesn't make any sense, but there are people do this type of sound, this type of weird stuff. I know there's going to be so many people who live in LA. They're going to be angry with me for dragging y'all, but I don't care because that mean, I'm sorry. You have to be honest that there's a lot of cookie mumbo jumbo that people buy into.

And as part of the reason why I will never, it's a beautiful place, love to visit, but I will never live there, but this is taking it to a whole nother level because I guess he, he has all these different contraptions. He has some sort of electromagnetic thing that he connects to Denise has had to make her go to sleep with magnetic games or [00:54:00] some shit.

And I mean, that's what he did. And it's like all of these go to sleep, but there's all these weird treatments he does that apparently have no basis in science or anything factual. And I didn't hear him say in that, in anywhere on that scene, where he gets this information from where you, I mean, I would be asking like, okay, well, where can I look this up?

Is any of your stuff, peer reviewed? Are there other doctor, you know, he's, is that Krista already

Nancy: being followed? What do you want from him? He can just give you all these resources he's being followed.

Chris: Well, that was the craziest part of it was for sure this whole conspiracy they've created in their head.

Is that like. The big pharma people and the corporations, and like the syndicate are following them and sending people to harass them and shit. This is not like Leah remedy fucking Scientology on the run. What are you [00:55:00] doing? What are you talking about? I can, I can guarantee because Denise said, Oh, you know, there are powerful people who are really scared of what Aaron does because you know, he put them out of business and blah, blah, blah, blah, blah.

No serious organization gives a shit about some creepy ass, droid it out. Dude, in LA who buys some stupid contraptions off of Amazon. And. It claims that he is some type of like which doctor who can put some magnetic waves and cure your cancer. So they've created this conspiracy theory where they're being followed and what's so creepy about their scenes too, is they keep saying all of this stuff to themselves, like, like a niece is like muttering under her breath.

If you watch it. Don't say anything more, Aaron, they're watching. Why

Nancy: nag girl? It's just us watch it.

Chris: It's just [00:56:00] watch it on demand with our wine.

Nancy: Yeah. I didn't have anything going on on a Thursday night. And I said, you know what? Let's unpack this real Housewives of Beverly Hills. It's gotten interesting since Lisa Vanderpump left.

Chris: But it's, it's so disappointing because like I said, I really did like to niece and her husband in the first season, but this season, they seem to a bit, but I have to say also, it now gives some credence to people who complain about bad editing, because if that is at the edit, but she got in the first season, made her seem as sane as she seemed.

And now we're seeing the other side. They're like what? The true side of Denise and Eric that's editing.

Nancy: I don't know. See, I can't really get on the blame, the edit bandwagon. I honestly, I think it was her first season. She's not dumb. She must have looked up previous seasons to see the mess she was [00:57:00] walking into and was like, I'm not going to show up with the full glam squad.

I'm just going to do me. I'm going to mind my P's and Q's, I'm not going to get in any drama. I'll listen all day, but I'm not really, I'm going to give a hard commentary on anything. I think she played the first season. Incredibly smart. I'm sure that in this season, Maybe she was like, wow, that was a lot of effort.

And let me just cash these checks and I'll just be myself who cares. Like maybe that's what it was, but she's yeah, I think she was just more or calculated last season and that we're seeing a little bit more of her. Cause what was her biggest thing last season? The whole happy ending episode. Yeah.

Reverend was like, Oh my God, the sexual openness. Oh my, my word, like some kind

Chris: of way about that

Nancy: or her talking about the size of her husband's Dick, like, which is why the threesome stuff seems so out of character this season. Exactly. I can understand. [00:58:00] I don't want my sex life talked about in front of my children.

Right. Like I get that dynamic, but these, these were the other house who gives a shit.

Chris: Yeah. I think just, it hit a nerve because of the branding situation. And of course we still don't know the full details. I mean, maybe, maybe they have maybe they're out there in the blogs and stuff, but I try to not read that so that I can actually enjoy the show without all the spoilers, but, Well, and then I go

Nancy: back after to see the mess on Twitter.

Chris: Right. But on the show, they just, in the last episode, Eric, like the mid season trailer that shows the rest of what's coming. And I don't know how far if you've gotten there yet, if you're all the way caught up,

Nancy: I am caught up now.

Chris: Yeah. So they showed that trailer. And it's all about the brand DMS and like Denise got to get exposed and like all of this stuff, which by the way, her stopping

Nancy: filming.

Chris: Yeah. But by the way, it didn't, if Denise just came out and said, yeah, I had [00:59:00] a threesome with Brandy and my husband was okay with it or whatever, it wouldn't be that big of a deal.

Nancy: Well, Hannah, I don't think this was a one and done type of situation.

Hey girl, you up.

I think that's what it was. Yeah. This is a, this was an ongoing, I don't know if it was purely a physical gig or if there was anything emotional with it. I don't know how much Aaron was involved. Maybe it was just a looking at touchy. Well, Brandy and. Denise had their fun. Maybe it was all of them in together.

I have no idea. I'm very excited when they showed Denise, sit back down in that chair and they were like, Denise, are you ready? And she just looked up

Chris: with full

Nancy: honey, those eyes. That was some, I got this big pussy energy and I'm coming through. I'm ready. Let's rip. The walls [01:00:00] down like that. I was like, Oh my God, I can't, I can't wait.

By the way. I

Chris: love if Lisa Vanderpump came back to like, give one of those interviews, just like, Oh my

Nancy: God, can they like run into her at a restaurant or something? And it just get really messy. Like I would love for that to happen. Oh

Chris: my God. Well now, Lisa, I don't think Lisa is ever going to come back to the show because she.

Oh for number one, she doesn't have any allies. Nobody on the show likes her anymore. And she, but she also, she's just too calculating and she's like, so careful about how she's partying trade that she can't handle not being in control of. What's. What's out there about her.

Nancy: My spirit animal is Lisa Vanderpump sitting with printed out screenshots of text messages at 170 point font like that to

Chris: text messages.

[01:01:00] Nancy: Well, obviously someone was lying with our mission. I was like, Oh girl, drag her.

Chris: Oh, I live for receipts on these fucking reality shows. I truly do.

Nancy: That's why I'm very curious. So. Not to totally switch gears. That's why I'm so curious with the real Housewives of Atlanta reunion, whatever receipts Portia said that she has in relation to Nini are not in any, I'm sorry, in relation to Cynthia,

Chris: Andy rep.

Nancy: Yeah. Did he on air? No, no. At the, after the end of the third one,

Chris: he

Nancy: never knew, he just said screenshot it to me. I think it got covered on watch. What happens live. Right.

Chris: He read it, he read it on the, on the reunion. It was basically, and they, and they responded to it. He was, he said it was basically like it's

Nancy: a little bit too much wine that night with my kids.

Chris: Yeah. I think you were because he not only read it, but then Kenya was like, see, so that's not what you said it was. And then, and then they have like an [01:02:00] argument. Now I

Nancy: vaguely remember that.

Chris: I'll let you said that, whatever,

Nancy: that was a heavy wine night with my

Chris: cat, the receipts w what the, what Porsche claimed the receipts said, it wasn't quite what she said.

20%, like what she was claiming, but not fully well dammit, but before we move on from how Beverly Hills, I just want to say, I'm starting to find a niece's husband, very scary, like aside from the fact that he's psycho and, and like a conspiracy theorist, he, there is that scene where. He brings or Denise brings her husband to whose house were they doing it at?

was it Erica's house on the last episode, the last like cookout or whatever that they had or they were all together arguing about the threesome thing. And Erin was there defending Denise.

Nancy: I thought that [01:03:00] was Kyle's house. No.

Chris: There was the first dinner where they first made the comments about the threesomes.

Then there was another dinner, which was at Kyle's house. There was to celebrate her, wrapping a movie, fuck probably

Nancy: the fucking

Chris: cameo and really

Nancy: let's do it all like dinners.

Chris: And then there was the third one, which was, I think the very last episode where Denise and Aaron storm out. And she's like, don't say anything on camera.

Yeah.

Nancy: Does he need to be reminded as you have like three guys,

Chris: three

Nancy: camera guys, two production assistants. You're passing the video village. You got to remind him he's on fucking camera. Not to say anything,

Chris: but it was so weird because essentially, so. They were bringing up again the whole threesome situation and confronting Denise about it because they were saying, we felt that you were shaming us and like kind of calling us bad moms because Oh yes.

Cause that's what it was [01:04:00] the, it was Kyle's house because they had. She had like a bouncy house and all this other stuff. And she's like, yeah, I texted you and told you that I was having like a trampoline and a bouncy house. It was going to be all this stuff for the kids. So like you knew that

Nancy: it was a very thoughtful on Kyle's part.

Chris: Yeah. You knew that it was going to be a party that was appropriate for kids to bring it. Wasn't an adult party. And so first and East lies and says, Oh, you know, so, and so had a play date and the other person was at their friend's house and blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. And then later it comes out that, Oh, no, she didn't, you know, she didn't want to bring her kids around this group anymore because it's a threesome conversation.

And so

Nancy: change the channel.

Chris: So they were arguing about that because they were like Janisa, which is, do you want to bring your kids around us or not? And if not, Y and then Aaron jumps in who I thought was talking to the women very aggressively. I, you know, I, I, I mean, I, it's kind of always awkward when the husband's like, get in the middle of the [01:05:00] drama between the Housewives, but the way he was speaking to them, it was like obvious that his intention was to like, intimidate them.

Yeah. And it was just very kind of like uncomfortable to watch and they almost didn't know. I mean, these are ladies who always have like clap backs, but like, they, they were almost like, so shell shocked by how, how aggressive he was that they didn't even know what to say or how to respond to it.

Nancy: well he put the speakers on 11, like real quick, right?

Like I don't even know it. I literally, when I was watching that episode, I was like, Oh, okay. So this Bravo screwed up the editing on this part. Cause something must have happened before. He's like this angry and then I rewound it because I was like, maybe I missed it. Did I look down and answer a text message?

And I was like, Nope, I was following right along. And it looks like it just escalated that quickly.

Chris: Right?

Nancy: I will say it's on brand though for him to turn out, to be a psychopath, because I did find him very attractive. So like it's all scraps. I'm [01:06:00] like, Oh, okay. Yeah, that's what it is.

Chris: Oh my God. Well, where we'll get to your, your messy dating life on another episode, but no,

Nancy: don't, they've done nothing wrong.

Why would you. Why would you subject them to that? They've done nothing

Chris: wrong. You found really disturbing was at the end of that scene. So, you know, Aaron goes out to them and they, you know, sort of stand their ground and they don't want to let it go without getting Denise to admit that she's wrong. And so she was Erin and Denise basically decide after this we're leaving.

So they get up and they just abruptly leave. But as they're leaving. Aaron is still muttering stuff under his breath. And Denise is saying to him, don't say anything. Don't say anything, stop talking where the cameras were on. You're still miked. You're still night. And then he goes to her, don't tell me what to do.

Don't tell me what to say. And then he says, if you tell, if you keep telling me what to do, I'm going to crush [01:07:00] your hand. And he was at that point in the, in the scene, he was holding her hand as they were leaving the house. And it was so bone chilling the way that he said it, like who, who says that to their wife, I'm going to crush your hand.

If you don't stop talking to me like

Nancy: that, I immediately had flashbacks to what's love got to do with it.

Chris: I had flashbacks too. Taylor Armstrong. Remember from the, from the earlier seasons and her husband, Russell was abusing her.

Nancy: Oh, when he's the one that killed himself, right?

Chris: Yeah. And can be almost like we don't say that, you know, he beats you, we don't say blah, blah, blah, blah.

But now we set it.

And he, like Denise had no reaction to him saying I'm going to crush your hand. So that's okay.

Nancy: This

Chris: is normal behavior. [01:08:00] And if he talks to the Housewives like that out in public, imagine how he probably talks to Denise behind closed doors.

Nancy: Let it man, try to talk to me like that once Rob a motherfucker.

Chris: I mean, he is a good looking guy, but I don't care how good the D is.

I don't know how you can, especially when you have children, especially when you have daughters, how you can. I mean, and it's not as if she is like financially dependent on him or something in the way that Taylor was with Russell where it's like, I don't have any options. I don't have, you know, I'm trapped.

It's like, this is. Someone who has the capability of not being with this guy. Cause I highly doubt he makes any real money, by the way. I'm I'm certain, he's the one living off Denise,

Nancy: Chris. He knows how to cure

Chris: cancer. Okay.

Nancy: Okay. He like. He grew up near the biggest nuclear facility in North America. Like what are you talking about?

He's obviously rolling,

[01:09:00] Chris: but I also wonder if that's part of the reason why she's so freaked out about this coming out about branded, because if in fact Erin isn't aware that she was having an affair with Brandy, or maybe he knew that it was like a onetime thing, but didn't know that it was ongoing or didn't know that it was like an emotional thing as well, that if he has this kind of.

Mercer possessive pathology that I can see why Denise is like, so terrified about getting out because she's afraid of what Aaron's going to do to her. Yeah. But the whole situation is just a huge mess child.

Nancy: I was very. Very surprised because especially if you look at the like, juxtaposition between how he was introduced to the group and now how he acts like it's kind of jarring, he came across as such as like.

Down to earth [01:10:00] guy and Oh, he really loves to niece and he's not judgmental about her past and all the problems she's had with Charlie. And like, because that was such a, like publicly messy divorce and relationship. So it was like, Oh, like what a good guy? Like he understands what she's been through and.

And he's so supportive and he loves her and yeah, they're going to throw together a wedding in four hours because, you know, they just can't wait. They just want to do it. Like it was such a cute, like, Oh, this is a pretty stable, I mean, other than out of all their relationships, like I love Renna and Harry Hamlin's relationship.

I, I think it's so

Chris: good time,

Nancy: girl. She leaned forward. She's going to choke the life.

I, it was so weird. I was not out of all that the plot twists that were going to be coming down the pike, this season, him turning out to be like a serial abuser of [01:11:00] Denise and like, Obviously willing to say some shit on camera. I'm like, Ooh

Chris: girl perched for the rest of the seasons mass and especially the reunion.

Cause this is just

Nancy: always

Chris: the best part of these reality show. Then everyone, everyone gets, could prize good with all the receipts and everything.

People fight about something the entire season.

It's on camera, but they did it.

Nancy: And that's what I love about social media too, because you can watch it. All of them wipe at each other as the episodes are airing of like get back in bed. Like what else happened?

Chris: Yeah.

Nancy: Were they like tagging each other and stuff? And like, this is shady boots business and I'm a thousand percent here for it.

[01:12:00] Chris: So we are going to move into the last segment of our show. At the end of each show, we're going to do a segment called on the couch with wine therapy, where Nancy and I, after having downed, however much wine we drank through the rest of the episode are going to take a stab at answering your. Quite serious questions.

So send in any questions you have any topics you want us to discuss any light problems you've got going on and, we'll do our best to take a stab at giving you the best advice we can. A couple of buying glasses in one, one of the topics I wanted to talk about that I had seen people. I'm talking about on Twitter was what do you do [01:13:00] when you find out that your best friend is being cheated on.

What do you do when you know that their spouse is cheating, but they don't know. What do you do with that information? Are you supposed to tell them, are you supposed to keep it to yourself? do you have receipts to prove it? Are you just suspecting? What do you do? What do you think?

Nancy: So I've actually, I've lived on both sides of this situation, where I knew about it and I said something, and then I know about it.

And I didn't say anything. the first one where I knew about it, it was a weird little triangle and the, the boyfriend. [01:14:00] Was the one that I was good friends with and I was good friends with the person he was cheating with and they kind of were both feeling guilty. So they casually let me know. So I decided to tell like, look, yeah, he's cheating.

And if you ask him about these dates and these times, like here's where he was like, yeah, I didn't want to know about this, but they've vomited all this information all over me and I just, I'm just telling you so you can make it right. And I got a whole lecture about how I'm just jealous and how I'm meddling and none of it, this is true.

And they would never, and. I just can't be happy for them. And so that friendship kind of disintegrated. Then I had a time where I knew, and I didn't say anything. Cause I was like, well, the truth will out, send my fucking business. And I don't have all the receipts. I just know because the girl told me, but I'm just gonna stay out of it.

[01:15:00] And then it came out that I knew and that friendship disintegrated. So I don't feel like I have good advice on

Chris: either. We'll see. The problem is I could, so here's what I would do. I feel like first of all, you don't really want to intervene at all unless you actually know for sure. That's how I feel. If you don't have concrete receipts.

That it's actually happening. If it just a suspicion or rumor, I would not share that with, with your friend, but if you actually know for a fact like an undeniable fact, That they're cheating. Then what I would do is I would go to the spouse and I would say, I know what you're doing. I have receipts. And if you don't tell your, if you don't tell my friend what's going on and come clean, I'm going to tell them and don't just leave it open.

Ended. Give them a date. If you don't tell them [01:16:00] by this date, I'm going to expose here and make them be the ones. To have to tell them so that you're not getting in trouble because what's going to happen is this is what happens when people tell their friend that their spouse is cheating. Either their friend doesn't believe them.

So they side with their spouse and stay with them and they cut you off as a friend. Cause they think, like you said that they think figure jealous. They think that you're trying to metal you're there. You're trying to start drama, whatever the case might be, or maybe they do believe you. And they do break up with the person, but they're still resentful toward you because you indirectly, we're responsible for them finding this out and this all coming out in their relationship dissolving.

So either way it's a lose lose for the person who has the information about their friend. [01:17:00] So the only way I see you coming out of it, Even just remotely clean is if you force the hand of the spouse for them to come clean on their own, but even then you still run the risk of your friend, finding out that you knew.

And that you didn't tell them. So I really don't know. There really is no, like easy, there's no like clear cut way to handle this because you're kind of screwed either way, no matter what you do.

Nancy: Welcome to the advice portion of our podcast, where we pretty much tell you everything's fucked and there's no right way to go about it.

Chris: Well, it is called wine therapist, so they can't expect to get a plus eight plus.

Nancy: Here's what you do when you find out that you have a best friend whose spouse is cheating on them, go to the liquor store, immediately, stock up, go home, and just don't talk to anyone. [01:18:00] Watch love is blind on Netflix or real Housewives of Beverly Hills

Chris: and consider this a

Nancy: tomorrow probably,

Chris: right?

Yeah, exactly. All of our topics on this episode, we're actually leading up to this very, this very segment.

Nancy: To this pivotal information, advice that we're giving you just, here's how you keep your life together. Go to the liquor store, but he'd get ready for

Chris: reality. Are you going to consider, what do you do in a situation?

So let's say it's not cheating, but let's say, you don't like the way that the spouse treats your friend.

Nancy: And while I'll voice that shit immediately,

Chris: you know, and maybe it's not physical abuse, although that could be it, but maybe it's you don't like the way that they talk to them, the way that they treat them.

Do you say, do you say something [01:19:00] to him? Do you say something to both of them? Do you say something to your friend privately? how do you deal with that? Or do you just keep it to yourself? Because it's not your relationship and you're just minding your business.

Nancy: I mean, Aye. Honestly, what would probably happen is if I saw some sort of interaction in a group setting, I could a thousand percent see myself doing this.

I'm kind of a Dick. I'd probably just fully call him out in front of everyone with some kind of joke, like, all right there, Ike Turner, that was a really harsh shit to say, like, and just. I try to almost publicly embarrass them a little bit about it. I, I will say out of

Chris: you're good at like diffusing situations with humor.

So it's like, I think that's, you know, you could do it in a way that it like gets the point across, but doesn't make you look like an asshole, but most people probably aren't capable of doing that.

Nancy: Oh my God. Well, thank you. [01:20:00] But now I think, I do think that, and it's like when I'm on Reddit reading some of the like advice things, and like the relationship subreddit where I'm like, how are these real things that get posted?

Like, I, I know a lot of women put up with some just straight fuckery and bullshit from, from men and I. I keep telling some of my girlfriends, how it's like deep, clean 20, 20, like the years, pretty much canceled. We're all quarantining. If there was ever a time in life to break something shitty habits that you have it's now.

And if it, if there was a time to like excommunicate old school, Amish style, people that are bad influences or toxic influences in your life, that now is the time. So I've

Chris: watched

Nancy: some of my friends really tolerate shitty behavior because some people truly do think like, well, I'd rather have this and be [01:21:00] alone.

Like, fuck that noise. I would much rather. Hang out with my cat and get super drunk and watch things and then settle for someone that's going to treat me like shit.

Chris: You just described my life for the past three months, but okay. Hanging

Nancy: out with your cat, getting drunk. I love it. And

Chris: I have an excuse. I haven't been able to leave the house.

It's been a quarantine. Okay. Shit.

Nancy: Hey, I've been quarantining. I've been very responsible with my quarantining. I wear my gloves when I go out and my mask, we just opened up on Friday. Like 50% capacity for restaurants. And I actually was like, maybe I'll go down to one. And then I walked past and saw no one with a fucking mask on and a huge line where everyone was like maybe six inches apart.

And I was like, Oh, new, new, new, new, new, I'm take my ass home. I will do to go. It is a grub hub kind of night. No, but I do, I do.

Chris: I've had situations where, like I [01:22:00] have a good friend who has. Gone through some very shady boyfriends in the past and one in particular, actually, no, there were two in particular that none of her friends liked.

And we didn't tell her,

Nancy: say, we're talking about me.

Chris: It's fine. It's not you.

But none of her friends liked. And she only found out that we didn't like them after the fact. And she was like, why didn't you guys say anything in a, why didn't you tell me? And you know, it's like you say that, but I feel like it's easy for you to say that now because you're not with them anymore. But I feel like if we had tried to say something at the time, you wouldn't have listened, you wouldn't have, you wouldn't have taken our advice.

So we just kept our mouth shut.

Nancy: I mean, I feel like bad relationship. Ship's parallel with like drug addiction. Like you kind of have to hit rock bottom before you see all the shit that's going on. [01:23:00] As you can proudly attest to everyone. I have not had good luck and I have, yeah, I've had some real, not winners, but I have been lucky in the sense that my friends have called out directly.

Like. Hey, he's kind of a piece of shit and treats you like really terrible. And in the moment I, you know, the Rose colored glasses are on him. No, you guys just don't like using, just don't know him. Like I know him, but in every single instance instance, they were correct that that person was an asshole and treating me poorly.

I'm happy that all my friends have been vocal with me and. That makes me the second. I know that people that are important in my life are like on board with someone. Then I actually have the ability to be even more excited, but I'm thankful for every single time any of my friends present company included have called me out on like, Nah, honey, [01:24:00] he's a piece of shit you should know.

And do you think this is normal because sometimes you get wrapped up in the whirlwind and you can't really see the forest through the trees,

Chris: but let's be real. Yeah. If you were in a relationship where you were like, you've been dating for a while and you're like, this is my soulmate. Like everything is going so great.

I love everything about them. I can see me getting married to this person and having children like. This is the person. And then I, or one of your other friends said to you, I don't like this guy. I think he's shiesty. I think he's shady. I don't like something, as he says, you you're telling me that it would make you reconsider or your relationship.

That

Nancy: would make me very heavily pause if you, so if you met the new boy that's been hanging around and you said to me from after a phone conversation, like, I don't like I'm not into it. I would have a very [01:25:00] like, Okay. Let me, let me really think about this. Cause, cause God, I don't even, how many years now have we known each other?

What are we 80? How many years?

Chris: I don't know. It's

Nancy: been a long time. So it does make me, and let's not kid ourselves. I was not always that way. But now that I'm a thousand years old and I've been shitty, shitty, shitty, shitty, said, he said, he said, he said shitty relationships and how I've seen people.

Important to me in my life, react to them. I definitely, I take it much more seriously now as I'm older. Cause I was completely retired from dating. That was like a whole moment where I was like, I'm just gonna focus on me and my cat. And obviously I keep fucking it up and not meeting the right ones and things keep going wrong.

So I just don't want to date. Anybody. I

Chris: just want to be by myself. It's around you retired from dating.

Nancy: I did. I deleted [01:26:00] everything.

Chris: A girl. How many times and re installed the apps

Nancy: I'm drunk. And I

Chris: always like I'm deleting, I'm deleting Tinder. I'm deleting everything and bitch, a month later, you're back on swipe and left swipe and right.

Cause sometimes I just get bored,

Nancy: but, but it's just like, I'll read, download, and it's just swiping and messaging. And then like, mainly I'm like, I can't wait to get a screenshot of me saying something funny that embarrasses the other guy where I have to get that unmatch. I, that let me tell you that is like, Cocaine to me at this point, when they send an opening line or I send an opening line and then whatever they come back with.

And I just say something that makes them so uncomfortable, they have to unmatch. I had a guy message me opening message. The last girl I met from here said she was going to put my Dick in a jar. Please be different. So my [01:27:00] response was

Chris: okay.

Nancy: Are you opposed to mantels? I dusted yesterday and then I was like 10 minutes of nothing.

And then I just said, plus I'm out of jars, immediate unmatched, but to me, that's hilarious. So that's out. I just kind of like bullshit and waste my time. So I've done. I downloaded them and not re downloaded them. but not like met up with anybody. It's just me on there. Sending horrible jokes and puns.

Chris: Yeah.

Nancy: Yeah. I was, I was retired. Everything was deleted. And I was like, yeah, I'm done with dating, just going to do the cat lady thing and travel all the time. And then I was like, Oh, the world is ending. Let me just download stuff. Cause this will be really fun because people are going to be desperate to talk to anybody.

Chris: huh.

Nancy: Okay. I hear you. Okay. That's fine.

Chris: That's fine. Okay, Ramona.

Nancy: Oh bitch, [01:28:00] that that's hurtful.

Chris: Not sleeping with anybody right now. I'm not dating anybody right now. I'm just enjoying my single life girl.

Nancy: Fast forward. 5.2 seconds.

Oh, Ramona. Oh God.

Chris: That is it for our very first episode. We did it. I hope you guys enjoyed it next time. I promise it will be shorter. Could still figuring out the flow of things and how long it takes for us to dive into each topic. So our goal is going to be to have them under an hour. We'll get that figured out by the next time.

But, please download, subscribe through Apple podcasts, [01:29:00] Google podcasts, wherever you listen to your podcasts, give us a review. If you can, hopefully you finished your wine and if not, and they should now, and we will see you next time. Thanks for joining us. Bye.